Feelings Now...

Since blogging about the Youth Christmas Party and our frustrations with the youth we have had quite a number of emails from friends expressing their sympathy, empathy and support. Thank you all so much for your words of encouragement, for the Bible verses that you highlighted to us, and the prayers that have been uttered. The emails were humbling to read and made us feel that it isn't a hopeless situation, that the youth can change. But that it would have to be God that did the changing, not us or their pastors.

In the end Alvin and I didn't do any of the clearing up. We decided to sit and wait and see what would happen, whether the youth would say anything about tidying up or do it without being asked. The tent frame and stage were left for another week and a half, and by that time the Somrong Christmas Party was going to take place, so Pastor Kea decided that the things should be left there as they would be useful for the party. So no tidying up there.

We attended the Somrong Christmas Party on the 1st January and were surprised to see the whole church looking so clean and tidy. The grass area in front of the church had been swept of all the litter from the Youth Party. We assumed that Pastor Kea told the youth to tidy up, but we never asked.

The programme that day was very much like the one we had planned for the Youth Party, with worship, a drama, gospel message and then food afterwards. The youth were very much involved in the running of the programme, they led the worship, performed the drama, set up the table and chairs for food in the evening and cleared everything up afterwards. Alvin and I were extremely confused at how efficient the youth were being, they were all helping out, they were in the right place at the right time, they knew what they had to do. Where these really the same youth that were supposed to be helping out at the Youth Party? The difference in behaviour was staggering!

One lady who we have had the privilage of meeting is Christina. She is from Singapore and taught English in Baray for a year, so she knows some of the youth quite well. And having been in Cambodia for a few years now she was able to tell us a little more about the Cambodian way of thinking. She asked us about how the Youth Party went, so we told her and then we asked how it could be that the same youth who were here today, could be doing exactly the things that we had wanted them to do 2 weeks previously. We chatted about this for a while and concluded on two points:

1. The youth did not feel that they "owned" the Youth Party. That they saw it as an event run by foreigners for them. It didn't matter that the pastors, Alvin and I had told the youth it was an evangelistic event. That it would be used to give the gospel to their friends. Maybe many didn't hear the instruction to pray for the friends they would invite. Nothing we had said about "do you love your friend enough to give them the gospel?" was heard, so there was no ownership of the event. Christina explained that the thought process is "the foreigners are planning a party for my friends, that means it's for me as well, that means I don't have to do anything, so I won't help."

2. Some of the youth really are just very self-orientated. Enough said.
I guess the first point explains why the youth were doing everything so well during the Somrong Christmas Party. They do it every year, and it's a church celebration, their church - ownership. So they help and they know exactly what they need to do. But it makes us question why they don't feel that way towards their friends. Maybe God will reveal this to us later on, but right now it still baffles us.

Anyhow. How are the youth now you ask? We see them at the prayer meeting on Saturday evening, and then on Sunday at the youth service, and occasionally during the week when they come to hang out in Pastor Kea's front yard. They are carrying on as they have always done, I don't think they know about how frustrated Alvin and I were at them. This whole thing reminds me of Jesus on the cross in Luke 23:34 when He says "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." How true. So what else can we do but forgive them? There's no point being angry about it because they don't even know we're angry, it would just be us fuelling the anger ourselves, mulling it over until it devours and destroys us. Ha, dramatic I know. But it's true. So we forgive them, and we will pray for them.

We ended up going with some of the youth to the concert that Peanut organised and it was great fun singing and messing around with them. Here are just a few of us with some famous dude in the background.

One incident was very humbling and showed me yet another side to the youth. There was a drunken guy who was disturbing everyone, and was moving closer to us. I heard one of the girls called Rachel say "boong Alice" - sister Alice, and then one of the guys nodded. When the drunk man got close the male youth shielded me from the drunk man, I tried to turn to look at the drunk man and Rachel grabbed my head, turned it the other way and said "no look!" They were trying to protect me! I can't say how humbled I felt at that point.

So that's about all really. Youth around the world are all the same underneath. For me I feel the same way about them as I do for the youth at CCIL; frustrated to the point of strangulation because I know they that can be so much more and they don't realise it, but yet they bring me so much joy and so many blessings that I can't help but love them. It's a funny world.